Lying Minds
If your mission is to slay a dragon then it’s a good idea to know a thing or two about dragons before you set out and fighting alcoholism is exactly the same. The mind of an alcoholic works differently to […]
Shame and alcoholism
Shame is a soul eating emotion. We often bundle shame and guilt together, but there’s a distinct difference between the two: shame is when we think “I am bad”, and guilt means “I did something bad.” But there’s something else […]
Alcohol is C2H6O… it isn’t magical!
Alcohol (ethanol) is a simple little chemical. It has two carbon atoms, six hydrogen atoms, and an oxygen atom. It doesn’t travel at speeds exceeding the speed of light and it doesn’t have the gravitational pull of a black hole… […]
Self-sabotage is real
As my recovery was strengthening I became acutely aware of the extent to which my mind was actively working against me. Even after I had summoned sufficient strength to fend off the cravings I still had to navigate my way […]
Alcohol tolerance and changes to our brain
It is the reward system that drives addiction, but the consequences of regular and heavy drinking lead us to be not just addicted. Regular and heavy drinking causes changes in us, and most particularly changes in our brain and mind. […]
Where out-of-the-blue cravings come from
After the initial period of constantly fighting off cravings our recovery slowly settles down to be less demanding on a day-to-day basis until suddenly, out of the blue, we get hit by a huge craving. Just why these suddenly pop […]
When we stop
I knew for a long time what happened if I didn’t drink in the evening… I wouldn’t sleep. But what I didn’t realise was that this only showed me one of several changes that had occurred in my brain and […]
I drank because…
I don’t get rattled often these days, but here’s something that gets me frustrated. I often read in recovery blogs, notice-boards, chat-rooms and online communities … “I drank because…” and usually what follows this rattles me. It troubles me and […]
Who becomes an alcoholic?
Why we’ve ended up in this position is a question that haunts us. It is as though knowing the answer will absolve us of the awful things we’ve done. But knowing the answer ultimately changes nothing; we are alcoholics, and […]
Understanding and learning from relapse
Relapse is a crushing and confusing experience. Stopping drinking is hard and I never understood quite how hard it was until I tried. It’s hard because sometimes the test can be ferocious, and sometimes it can be devious… my addiction kept finding new ways to challenge me. Until I realised just how hard it was, and how devious it could be, I didn’t bring enough to the attempt… that’s my experience. But relapse isn’t failure, it is education.
Where cravings come from
Cravings are an urgent sense of wanting, desire or longing for. They have no words, sound or shape; they are an intense feeling without form. Cravings may appear to come and go in a fickle manner, but they don’t come […]
Self-sabotage and the big lie
When we try to stop drinking we are confronted by many challenges. We have to overcome incredibly powerful cravings of course, but there is far more. Our daily routines have to change, people we associate with have to change, and […]
Relapse is growth
This post continues from Relapse! Relapse comes in many shapes and sizes. The first relapses we endured were failures to limit our drinking when we wanted to… e.g. “I’ll only have a couple”. It was when we realised that we […]
Is alcoholism a ‘disease’?
People coming to terms with a serious drinking problem struggle a lot with this idea. Many therapies for overcoming alcoholism describe it as a “disease”, but this is not always a helpful description. The principal problem with this is that […]