The Last Post
I started this blog three years ago knowing that I would need an online platform to deliver my book for free. However there is little or no interest in what I write and few downloads so I don’t see why […]
Cravings and triggers
There was one thing about my drinking that I simply couldn’t understand. I was perfectly capable in every other aspect of my life but for some bizarre reason I couldn’t control my drinking. I drank more than I should, I […]
Lying Minds
Alcoholics are not damaged, faulty or broken, and we aren’t bad or weak people: we are deceived: deceived by our own minds. Most people that drink heavily in their youth will mature out of it, and those that drink to […]
Why we can’t get sober on our own
Nothing is 100% black or white in addiction but the evidence in the research on one thing is very clear; people that maintain regular contact with a recovery group of one form or another are FAR more likely to achieve […]
Our past is not the problem
We have a desperate need to understand why we drink the way we do. This need isn’t simply an urgent quest for knowledge it is driven by something far more powerful: shame, or rather, the need to avoid it. We […]
Shame and alcoholism
Shame is a soul eating emotion. We often bundle shame and guilt together, but there’s a distinct difference between the two: shame is when we think “I am bad”, and guilt means “I did something bad.” But there’s something else […]
Alcohol is C2H6O… it isn’t magical!
Alcohol (ethanol) is a simple little chemical. It has two carbon atoms, six hydrogen atoms, and an oxygen atom. It doesn’t travel at speeds exceeding the speed of light and it doesn’t have the gravitational pull of a black hole… […]
Finding hope
While I may have understood at an intellectual level why stopping drinking was essential, my heart wasn’t in it. In my mind I can evaluate all the information: drinking makes me miserable, causes all sorts of problems, and will if […]
The 100+ challenge
By far the most likely time to relapse is in the first two weeks after stopping drinking. But relapse after 100 or so days is also extremely common. I want to talk about three aspects of relapse at this time […]
The gift of desperation
I carried on drinking excessively far, far longer than is rational. Normal drinkers around me looked on in despair; they couldn’t figure me out at all… and they couldn’t be expected to; their minds work completely differently to mine with […]
Self-sabotage is real
As my recovery was strengthening I became acutely aware of the extent to which my mind was actively working against me. Even after I had summoned sufficient strength to fend off the cravings I still had to navigate my way […]
Stopping drinking: What to actually do and why
Stopping drinking is hard. If you ever hear anyone say it isn’t then they either don’t understand the challenge or they’re trying to sell you something. It is so hard because it is not actually alcohol we are fighting it […]
The decision
There came a time that I realised my drinking had to end. It took far longer than I care to admit to come to one very simple realisation… that I could not control my drinking; I drank more than I […]
The buck stops here
Stopping drinking is simple… all that’s required is that we don’t drink! But simple is not the same as easy. Stopping drinking is extremely difficult, and the reason that it is so difficult to stop drinking is that our entrapment […]
Alcohol tolerance and changes to our brain
It is the reward system that drives addiction, but the consequences of regular and heavy drinking lead us to be not just addicted. Regular and heavy drinking causes changes in us, and most particularly changes in our brain and mind. […]